It is no doubt that today the amount of Love Distortions in the Media is unbelievably delusional.
According to some relationship coaches, Those distortions have created a new set of expectations and standards for people to follow and to believe in as the guidelines that they must follow.
Relationships Are Not Like That In The Movies
A movie’s ending is never a happy one without the male and female protagonists falling in love with each other otherwise the viewers are not happy with the ending.
Moreover, this can affect the movie’s reviews too, as a result, producers and movie writers fuel up their scripts on love stories.
It is even frowned upon to hear individuals saying that they don’t want to get married as it no longer positively correlates with the society’s expectations of young people.
It has become an absolute equation: Happiness = Love! For instance, Turkish Series are based on nothing but love stories regardless of the main storyline, there has to be a love story in every scene with all the cast.
As A Coach, When observing the relationships in the series carefully from a professional coaching point of view, it is safe to conclude that those relationships are toxic. However, they are highlighted as the ultimate luck that can hit a person during their lifetime. From A coach point of view, there are several points that highlights the toxicity of the relationships portrayed in the media are as follows:
1-Lack of Commitment
Commitment is one of the most important pillars of a relationship. The relationships are based on both protagonists breaking up multiple times due to severe issues along the way and making up again which sets the wrong expectation for the viewers, as well as the client that comes to relationship coaching sessions, that it is normal to have an unstable relationship full of separations.
This teaches our generation that this is what a relationship should look like, 10 breakups a week! It neglects the important side of the commitment in the relationship. Hence, it is very important to highlight this issue during the coaching sessions with your clients.
2- Fights mean Love and Attention
The amount of fights in the media between lovers in a movie or series is insane as this is what created the spice in the viewers’ mind to remain intrigued on how the man will approach his love to earn her back again.
The fight can be something such as him breaking everything around him and potentially putting her in danger, evidently, this could be a very thin line to domestic violence.
Furthermore, this could be a man who has anger issues that can put him and his family later on in danger.
Unfortunately, when this scene is explained later on by him to his love, he justifies that he loves her and his actions are out of jealousy which is love. and that is what most of the clients believe in and talk about during the coaching sessions.
When observing such actions, we can easily tell that they are out of insecurity and possessive love and not true love. When young men and women grow up watching such distortions, simply they would justify that their jealousy can go to the sky and would never think of it as insecurities that may root from childhood and may affect their self-esteem and can need coaching and sometimes therapy.
3- It is Meant to Be!
As coaches, Sometimes when we receive clients during the coaching sessions, who are dealing with a heartbreak and are still in the Denial Stage, we often hear them saying “I know it is meant to be, it is my fairy tale, X from the movie Y earned back his love”
Unfortunately, sometimes this is not the truth of the situation. Sometimes their love is not meant to be but due to their hope that has been extended from the movies, they would remain in the Denial Stage forever thinking that there is hope.
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